Mario Cipollini was an Adonis even before Adonis was an Adonis. He bought so many tickets on himself that they sold out and he had to put on an extra show. He was a great sprinter (just ask him) and won 191 races as professional between 1989 and 2005, including the world champs title in 2002. Cipo would typically prepare for big races in the discotheque and declared that, 'If I weren't a professional cyclist, I'd be a porn star.' Ever the diplomat, Cipo would refuse to ride the mountain stages of the Tour or Vuelta and instead release photos of himself lounging around in deck chairs at the beach while his compatriots turned themselves inside out in the mountains. He also got arrested in 2002 for motorpacing on an Italian autostrada (average driver speed 150kph), and in his defence claimed that the autostrada was the only place where he could safely maintain the speed his glorious legs demanded.
Cipo's flamboyance also led to some dubious skinsuit choices:
Incidentally, it is good to see that Cipo abides by Lisa's Mum's rules of cycling fashion, which dictate that if you are extremely good at riding and can beat anyone over any distance, on any terrain, then you can wear what you like.
Given Cipo's credentials, it is fitting that Lisa's Mum's new column 'What Would Cipo Do?' is devoted to the aspirational Super Marios among her readership. If you have a conundrum that requires the wisdom of Lisa's Mum and the spectacular manliness of Cipo, please direct it to her either by commenting below, or by email at firstname.lastname@example.org. We will consider them carefully in the context of what the Lion King himself would do.